”Sipping my coffee, I looked out the window at cars and pickup trucks pulling in and pulling out, big tractor trucks rushing by in both directions. ...everal trucks were loaded with bales of hay and I realized other ranchers were doing what I had just done. I half listened to the twangy music playing from a radio. I glanced up at the clock on the wall over the front door. It was almost nine and wondered if Carla would show up, but then I saw her truck pull in and park next to mine. She was. ” And her voice trailed off.Say it, I thought. You know you want to.“This is bullshit,” Chad said. “I don’t want to deal with this right now.” And he went storming away.I wasn’t about to argue, so I just followed him outside. Chad went stomping down the street, so I had to hurry to keep up.I’d seen flashes of Chad’s temper before. I knew that in most cases, he wouldn’t stay mad for long. But I also knew his sexuality was an especially sensitive subject, and that it called for careful. ..The warm glow of yesterday's conversation with my father ended inthe cold reality of Monday morning. The cold reality that I was ayoung, teenage girl. The cold reality that I was expected to actlike a girl, something totally foreign and yes, something I foundeven a little scary. And the cold reality that I had no idea whyI was here or where this life would take me. The only thing goingmy way at the moment was the pair of comfortable, low-slung heelsI wore with the blue dress my mother had. "Does not look like you felt that way at the time. Besides I couldn't delete it even if I wanted to. That was a link to a website. My Spainish is pretty poor but it looks like blond-cook-gringo-ass-sluts-dot-com, and your viewing hits seem to be piling up by all the emails I am getting."Mary dropped into the chair next to and grabbed my arm. "Job, please listen to me. What I am about to say is the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Everything just spiraled out of control, but I.
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